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  • While I was backing out of Lot 3, I heard a “HEEEY” and then a crash, it turns out I hit a PS officer on a bike. FML

    December 4, 2009 | 8 Comments | Post Comment
    Score: +71 / -5

     
    • Anonymous 3:01 pm on December 4, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      holy crapp hahaha

    • Anonymous 9:47 pm on December 4, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      i know who this issss!

      • Anonymous 6:17 pm on December 5, 2009 Permalink | Reply

        ouchh…i feel bad for that officer…did they write you up?

    • Anonymous 7:55 pm on December 5, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      You’re obviously a girl

      • Anonymous 1:56 pm on December 6, 2009 Permalink | Reply

        ^you’re obviously an asshole

      • Anonymous 11:33 pm on December 6, 2009 Permalink | Reply

        you’re obviously correct.

    • Anonymous 10:15 pm on December 5, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      I’m surprised that after attending Wheaton, where gender equality is stressed so heavily, that u would still post this comment.

    • Anonymous 9:08 pm on December 16, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      I know youuu :)

  • I just got accepted to Wheaton! MLIG.

    March 25, 2010 | 6 Comments | Post Comment
    Score: +65 / -5

     
    • ... 12:02 am on March 26, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      yay! be careful what you read on this site. not everyone is as crazy as they make themselves sound on here……… good luck!! ;-P

    • anonymous 12:23 am on March 26, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      congrats

    • Welcome!! 6:27 am on March 26, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      congrats!!! you must be really proud! can’t wait to have you with us next semester!

    • Good for you! 1:29 pm on March 26, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      congratulations!! seriously dont let the site scare you off! we all have little problems and get frustrated but for the most part, ppl dont mean all they say about wheaton on here!

    • Anon 3:35 am on May 12, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      Good luck, you’ll need it

    • Anonymous 6:31 am on September 2, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      Congratz@

  • I am pretty sure Ann Curry got our Wheaton mixed up with the other Wheaton in her speech a little bit. FOL.

    May 22, 2010 | 11 Comments | Post Comment
    Score: +62 / -4

     
  • I go to Wheaton in Illinois. FML

    December 10, 2009 | 3 Comments | Post Comment
    Score: +57 / -0

     
    • wheaton, ma is the shit 12:06 am on December 11, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      FYL indeed

    • Anonymous 9:37 am on December 11, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      you’re allowed to use the internet at wheaton Illinois?

    • anonymous 5:52 pm on December 12, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      hahahahaha that must suck more than the one here in MA

  • I kicked a soccer ball in my hallway which hit and broke a sprinkler head. I flooded 3 of the 4 floors and now have 150hrs of community service to do by may. FML.

    November 12, 2009 | 6 Comments | Post Comment
    Score: +59 / -4

     
    • Simon 2:23 pm on November 12, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      You, my friend are one unlucky person, i’m sittin here in Ireland after a wheaton friend of mine told me to look at this, you’re post is by far the unluckiest and most entertaining!

    • Anonymous 10:39 pm on November 12, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      hahaha i know you

    • Anonymous 11:07 pm on November 12, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      mwhahaha. well done, sir. well done. maybe for halloween you can dress up as a sprinkler.

    • Anonymous 1:58 am on November 13, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      i did dress up as a sprinkler for halloween

    • Anonymous 9:31 pm on November 15, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      you are so hott. i love seeing you clean my building<3

    • Anon 3:34 am on May 12, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      you’re an idiot. you admit to nothing

  • I was yelling goodbye to some friends outside of chase. I went to say “Later Gator” but quickly decided to say “Later Guys” half way through. I ended up combining both and yelling “Later Gays” instead. FML

    November 30, 2009 | 2 Comments | Post Comment
    Score: +56 / -2

     
    • Anonymous 4:45 pm on December 3, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      this put a smile on my face. thank you. It happens to the best of us

    • anon 12:35 am on December 9, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      best wheaton fml i’ve read so far :-D

  • I took some x-rated pictures of myself for some girl and accidentaly forwarded them to my professor, I dropped the class and I need it for connections. FML

    November 13, 2009 | 3 Comments | Post Comment
    Score: +57 / -3

     
    • Anonymous 12:06 am on November 14, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      Your and idiot I bet u live in meadows dumb ass

    • Anonymous 12:39 am on November 16, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      This might just be my favorite post. I almost pissed my pants.

  • I have to stay with a friend’s family for Christmas and must be on my best behavior. So far I have gone to church 3 times, discussed the book of revelation over dinner, and sang happy birthday to the baby Jesus. I’m an atheist. FML

    December 25, 2009 | 1 Comments | Post Comment
    Score: +54 / -1

     
    • Anonymous 5:05 am on December 26, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      Could be worse, could be stuck with your family instead.

  • Today, I found out what I did last weekend from the public safety log. FML

    November 11, 2009 | 0 Comments | Post Comment
    Score: +56 / -3

     
  • I go to Stonehill college and theres fucking nothing going on here so I somehow found myself reading all your damn FML’s. FML

    November 16, 2009 | 2 Comments | Post Comment
    Score: +53 / -1

     
    • Anonymous 8:28 pm on November 17, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      wow you sound like a great kid!! one that i would want to be best friends with…NEVER!!

    • Anonymous 7:36 pm on November 18, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      Thanks Julia, who do you think got me addicted to this site… loser. :)

  • I walk around campus with fluffy black cat ears and a long coat. I just found out that someone has been taking random anonymous pictures of me with their cell, without ever bothering to come up and say hello. FML

    December 3, 2009 | 14 Comments | Post Comment
    Score: +52 / -1

     
    • anonymous 5:30 pm on December 3, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      cat girl!! ahh i love u, ur like cow duck around here

      • Cat Girl 10:01 pm on December 3, 2009 Permalink | Reply

        Uh, thanks…I think?

    • ignoranceshouldbebanned 10:31 pm on December 3, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      umm, that was quite ignorant. the woman with the cat ears should need be compared to the unofficial college mascot, she’s a person not something that should be objectified. She’s not an animal or a cartoon. I apologize woman with the cat ears for the person’s comment above.

      • Cat Girl 3:39 pm on December 4, 2009 Permalink | Reply

        Hey, it’s cool. I just wish people would say hi instead of doing the creepy stalker thing, y’know?

    • Anonymous 10:32 pm on December 3, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      I think your a strong person for not fitting into the stereotypical dress code of the world.

    • Anonymous 12:08 pm on December 4, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      shut up.

    • anonymous 12:47 pm on December 4, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      calm down lol

    • Mr. Jefferson 5:11 pm on December 4, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      I would love to be compared to cow duck– he’s a g.

      that’s not ignorance that’s a compliment.

      • Anonymous 6:03 pm on December 5, 2009 Permalink | Reply

        cow duck is actually a she….

      • Anonymous 4:26 am on December 6, 2009 Permalink | Reply

        Nonetheless… SHE’s a G.

    • Anonymous 10:54 pm on December 5, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      Take the fuzzy ears off and nobody will take your picture… just a thought.

    • Anonymous 3:22 pm on December 10, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      CAT GIRL!!! YOU’RE FAMOUS!! I don’t even go to Wheaton, I’ve never even been to Massachusetts. I go to school in California and I know who you are!!! AHHHHHH AUTOGRAPH PLEASEEEEEE.

      • Cat Girl 3:09 pm on December 11, 2009 Permalink | Reply

        i47.tinypic.com/2eltg2g.png

        • Anonymous 4:03 pm on June 30, 2010 Permalink

          LOVE YOU!!!!!

  • I had 3 windows open in the computer lab. One was facebook stalking, the other was my email and the last one was porn. I was on facebook when my professor saw me and began to walk over and I tried to pretend I was doing work and clicked the porn tab by acident and the professor frowned and left. FML

    November 24, 2009 | 1 Comments | Post Comment
    Score: +53 / -3

     
  • I got home after dinner and couldn’t find my diploma. Then I realized it looked remarkably similar to the menus we handed back earlier. FML

    May 24, 2010 | 1 Comments | Post Comment
    Score: +51 / -1

     
    • dfjfe 9:51 am on May 26, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      This is the biggest FML I’ve ever read on this site. That diploma is worth about $200,000 in tuition…

  • I was giving a presentation in Knapton Lecture and afterwards my friend told me that the podium microphone I had been speaking into was actually a lamp. FML

    December 7, 2009 | 1 Comments | Post Comment
    Score: +51 / -2

     
    • Serious 2:37 pm on December 14, 2009 Permalink | Reply

      It’s Gale Beggy!

  • I just tried to pet a squirrel…its time for the semester to be over. FML

    December 1, 2009 | 0 Comments | Post Comment
    Score: +52 / -3

     
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